I guess that's where I am, right now, in life. I'm not really a Professional anything, other than a self-proclaimed self-doubter. But I'm not really a complete Amateur, either. As usual, I'm stuck between two extremes, never the sell out, never the groupie, never the president. 

I am always somewhere in the middle.

Usually, that's where I want to be. Don't tie me down! Don't back me into a corner! Let me collect my facts and hug them close, they're my friends!

Except...in retrospect, my entire life has been one giant, unconfirmed cloud, one of those greyish blobs that hide the sun but never produce the precipitation you assume it's holding inside it's damp self. 

Lived in 7 different states.

Attended 5 different schools; 2 different colleges.

Worked for 5 different veterinary clinics.

Have switched majors 7 times. 

But now, I'll have a B.A. in December. I always thought this would change things for me, that I'd be going places, doing things, seeing people.

I suppose I am, in some ways.

But not in the ways I saw it in my head.

I saw grandeur, I saw my life aspirations, I saw bright lights and big signs, high fences and tough horses, toned muscles and no pain.

Boo.

The dogs have to go out.